Tonight, I'm tired and so tomorrow I'll attack the blog updates. Tonight my thoughts are on faith and trials. The past month we have been through a lot of hard experiences, and at times I have felt like God is picking on me. Now of course, I know that's not true. But, at my worst (and believe me I've had a lot of "worsts" lately) I have felt like everything is going wrong and I'm stuck in this hole that keeps getting deeper and deeper and I just can't get out.
Today I walked into Drake's room while he was napping and watched him while he slept for a moment and my eyes welled up with tears as I felt overcome with the love I have for him. I thought to myself about how complete he makes my life. I thought about how lucky and blessed I am to have him every day, that I was able to carry him for 9 months and have been able to spend almost 9 months with him. Throughout the day, I've reflected on these thoughts and on the enormous love I have for Drake- so enormous and full that I can't describe this love. I feel like no one could love anything so much.
Tonight, I had a sort of epiphany as I realized that this is the love my Heavenly Father has for me. His love is infinite, it's unchanging and eternal. I am realizing that through our trials, we learn to have faith in him, and they are for our benefit. He knows me and recognizes my hardships and my pains, and I'm sure he would take them away in an instant if he could, but if he did I would never learn anything. Just like when Drake is older and I want to take away his every burden and trial, I won't because it will be for his benefit. I guess I'm just realizing tonight that Life Is Hard, but it's hard for a reason. All I can do is have faith in Heavenly Father and my Savior and I know they will never desert me. I know they will help me get through whatever hand I am dealt.
I am so thankful for this knowledge, for answers to prayers, and for my family. Life is hard, but it is so very good.
6 comments:
Beautifully said, Linds! You are awesome and good for you for recognizing the Heavenly Father's hand in your life. I honestly don't know how I could make it day to day without the knowledge that I have. I'm sorry that things have been rough lately for you. Life is overwhelming at times, isn't it? But, like you said, I look at my little kids everday and realize what a blessing each one of them is in my life and they are just 6 of the amazing blessings Heavenly Father has given me. Good luck! I'll be praying for you.
what is going on? I am sorry that you are going through so much. I will send some prayers your way. Drake is getting so big. Thank you for your testimony!!
I hope things get better soon!
Beautiful, Linds. Just beautiful!
Linds, I must have been inspired to tune in to your blog, cause I needed to read your words. Thanks so much! You must have been inspired to write that not just for yourself, but for me. :) Love you girl!
I loved that post. Thanks!
Hope things start looking up.
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